Zoro in Wonderland
by zorofreak
Summary: Sanji has a surprise for zoro, who never knew that sanji had magic up his sleeves!
1. Chapter 1

Zoro in wonderland

By Gabrielle Wormack

ZORO: Alice

Author: narrator

It was an ordinary day on the Thousand sunny…

Sanji reading a book, he's very intrigued about what he's reading…

There is Zoro … lifting weights...

Zoro: 1148, 1149, 1150...there. that should be enough for one day. Now time for a nap.

(lays down)

Luffy is also napping, after at least 25 plates full of meat.

Sanji mischievously looks at the sleeping Zoro.

Sanji: hehe...

Sanji waves the book over the unsuspecting Zoro. The book seems to be glittering as this process is made…

Sanji's plan: to get Zoro to be in his dreams…But it will be amazingly real to him!

Sanji: sweet dreams, Marimo…

Zoro: this is a strange dream… I'm walking to I don't know where. There's no one around.

(looks around) hey! Look, there's some one. Oi! Do you know where…I…am?HUH? (person disappears, Zoro follows behind) he went into this door… (pondering) I guess I'll follow him, since no one else is here... (there are steps thus, Zoro sees mostly darkness but steps anyway.) Wow… this place is dark... (steps again, and falls) AH!

**************************BLACK SCENE *********************************************

Zoro: (finally lands) well, THAT was a peaceful landing… (sees a person down a hallway) wha? HA! There he is! Almost like he was waiting for me!

(later)

Zoro: Shoot, I lost him!

Narrator: well, you've been doing good so far! Let me help you out! (book appears by Zoro)

Zoro: (surprised) A book? (somehow reads it far enough to understand) Hey, this has the same sanario as me. I guess I would have to find a small door...hmm. (looks briefly). There it is, but how did that person get in there... (realization...). Much less, how could I get in?

(he sees a bottle, does not notice the key (yet))

Zoro: HUH? A bottle? That's new. What do I do with it?

Narrator: DRINK IT!

Zoro: Okay… (kind of suspicious, but drinks it anyway). Mmm...tastes like sake,(shrinks a bit) onigiri, (shrinks some more)

Narrator: Uh… Zoro?

Zoro: (continuing without realizing) and sake all—(shrink) in—(shrink) one! (sitting down) That's strange. How'd I (looks around) … I'm TINY! There was a key up there too!

_**Artist: now you figure it out?**_

Narrator: Alas, now Zoro will never be able to reach the key! So Zoro just sat there and cried…

Zoro: (mad) What? I will not cry! If I read correctly in this book, (flipping through book) she—(meaning Alice) would have to grow back to get the key!(pauses and grabs hilt of a katana) Well, that's not going to happen! (narrator: No, wait!)Oni… Giri! (table leg gets cut in two and shatters)…heh, didn't know Alice could do that, did ya? (grabs the significantly bigger key)... Now what?

Narrator: Open the door crazy!

Zoro: I don't know how to do this!

Narrator: What? You just stick the key into the slot right there and-

Zoro: (tries) Okay… this stupid thing won't open… (grabs hilt again) Well…

Narrator: Don't Zoro!(slice)

Zoro: (outside now) Good, now to the rabbit's house… according to this book… (to narrator) Can I get bigger now?

Narrator: NO! you completely skipped the dodo bird part… you won't be able to bet bigger until you get to the house


	2. Zoro in the rabbits house

Zoro in wonderland part2

The Rabbit's house

**Brook: rabbit**

**Franky: bill**

Zoro: -sigh-

Narrator: what's wrong now Zoro?

Zoro: I'll tell you what's wrong? First, I think that that crazy Sanji made that stuff that made me small. Second, I want to get out of here! Where are my swords when I need them!... Hey look, a house!

Brook: Yohoho! Hello!

Zoro: Do I know you?

Brook: me? I don't know you! Yohoho! Anyway, could you please get inside and get my cane? Yohoho!

Zoro: suspicious I was just about to go inside…

Brook: Well good! Yohoho! Please hurry, Yohoho. I'm VERY late! Yohoho!

Zoro: WOULD JYA PLEASE QUIT WITH THE YOHO'S? IT'S GETTING ANNOYING!

Brook: okay.. yoho..

Zoro: that guy looks weird, so I have to get his cane right? I wonder where it is? ( sees room) this looks like the only building in the house! Hey look, a cane. (questioning tone).. now, did you say I would get bigger at this place?

Narrator: yes, I did. Do you want some sake zoro?

Zoro: yes, some sake might be good around now..( chugs the thing down!).AH! ( sweating)I feel as if I got poisoned again… ( grows a bit) dizzy, ( growing some more) faint and—OUCH!.. (looks around) huh?.. woah.. im big again, sweet!...but i'm not exactly stopping... I will need to get down a little for more space..WAIT A SECOND! How big is this place? It looked normal from outside, but that's at least twice as small as my normal size so then..I'M GONNA BREACK THROUGH THE ROOF!


	3. zoro in the rabbit's house STILL

Zoro in wonderland

**Franky : Bill**

Zoro: great… ju~st great!

Narrator: What is it now, Zoro?

Zoro: you're the narrator, see everything, and ask me what's wrong? Pretty soon, I'm going to crash the house down because of my size!

Narrator: So... you want to be SMALLER? I thought you wanted to get BIGGER, now you complain?

Zoro: WOULD JYA BE QUIET?*sigh* Yes, I DID want to get bigger, but this is too much...

Brook: (suddenly appearing) Yohoho! Hey, do you have my cane yet? Yohoho.

Zoro: oh snap! It's that guy! (suddenly frantic) I have to get smaller fast! (sweating and shaking)

Narrator: Whoa Zoro! You're SHAKING THE HOUSE!

Zoro: (cooling down a bit) What should I do now? I'm going to watch that door!

Narrator: don't worry, just wait till the rocks come, then I'll tell you the rest!

Zoro: ROCKS? (frantic again)

Narrator: Calm down, he might hear you!

Brook: ( tries door, but Zoro's foot is pressed hard against it) Well, Yoho! I can't get in!Bill, come over here!

Franky: Yes?

Brook: Bill, I want you, Yohoho, to get that thing out! Go into the chimney if you !

Zoro: (thinking, looking up at the roof) The chimney?

Narrator: Can you stick your foot in the chimney Zoro?

Zoro: I think I could put my foot in there. (struggles slightly, since there is not much room to move in)

Franky skuttles down thoe chimney, unsure of what might happen next

_**Artist says "that's right! You better get scared"!**_

Zoro: (suddenly) I think … he's on… MY FOOT (kick right then)

Franky: A~H! (flies into the air and crashlands infront of brook)

Zoro: (laughing hard) BWAHAHAHHA!

_**Artist says "that's for having zoro be your right leg!" **_

Brook: (worried) Bill! Yoho! Are you alright?

Franky: (sorely beat) yah, I'm fine. I was just going down then something comes up at me and hit me hard! Then I shot up fast like a bullet!

Brook: (dismayed) What are we going to do now?

Zoro: Oh, I DO hope they have a good idea… it's very crowded in here!(saddened)

Franky: I'VE GOT IT!

Both Brook and Zoro: What is it?

Franky: ( suddenly revenge- stricken) we can BURN THE HOUSE DOWN!

Zoro: ( scared) WHAT! I'm done for… (gets mad) IF YOU DO, I'LL CUT YOU IN TWO!

EPIC PAUSE

Zoro: (pondering the sudden silence) What next?

LONG PUSE


	4. zoro and the catapiller

Zoro in wonderland

**Crocodile: caterpillar **

Zoro: (snoring) (random rock hits Zoro's face) ITAI! (Rubs face) Hey, that hurt! To narrator well those were the rocks, what now?

Narrator: eat them…

Zoro: WHAT?... I guess I'll take your word for this... (Eats a "rock, and rapidly starts to shrink) Hey, I'm shrinking! *********************

Two rocks later

Zoro: I guess one more might do… (Shrinks) There! Now I'll get his cane and get out of here! (Gets cane and runs out) okay, I'm out!

Brook: YOU RASCAL! (Throws rocks Zoro)

Zoro: I have to stop this! slices the air to get some space) KARASUMA GARI!

Brook: OUCH! Yoho…

Zoro: Phew! I had to get out of there! (Looks around, and notices a change in scenery) huh? How'd the grass get bigger?

Narrator: well, being big at the house was different than being here…

Zoro: that seems very confusing… anyway, how can I get bigger? (Sees someone) hey, can you help me?

Crocodile: who are you?

Zoro: I was Roronoa Zoro, but my size is not one that would not fit that name…I can't be myself for too long...

Crocodile: What do you want?

Zoro: I would like to get taller. 2.5 inches is a boring size!

_**Artist says: how do you know you're 2.5 inches?**_

Crocodile: 2.5 INCHES IS THE BEST HIGHT TO BE!(Really mad)

Zoro: well, I don't like it! Help me already!

Crocodile: okay fine… the mushroom, both sides have different effects. One side'll make you Big, the other side, the opposite!

Zoro: (grabs sides and breaks them off) okay, now, which side is which?(Looks and sees no one) hm? He's gone. Oh well. I'll take this side right (eats, and suddenly grows humongous) WHOA! Now I'm too BIG. I guess I'll take the other side then... (Shrinks to normal) There. (Places the mushroom sides in pocket) I'll just save these for later!


	5. zoro and the very short tea party

Zoro in wonderland

**Ussop: mad hatter**

**Luffy: March hare**

**Chopper: dormouse**

Zoro: What's this place?

Ussop: Please join us in our tea party!

Luffy: We do have some meat, you want some?

Zoro: uh… no thanks. (Sits down)

Ussop: okay… (Starts singing) Let's party!

Zoro: (to self) These guys are crazy!

Ussop: Time to move!(Pulls Zoro across side of table)

Zoro: WHOA! OI! (Sits down) What was that for?

Luffy: We do that to get our exercise!

Chopper: (sleepily) exercise, exercise..

Ussop: (just relizing chopper) Be quiet, you…(shoves him in a giant teacup nearby)

Zoro: Why did you do that?

Ussop: Well,whenever we put him in there he gets mad and gets REALLY big!

LOUD ROAR FROM TEAPOT

Zoro: oh, I see..(sweat mark)

Ussop: (ignoring the roar) Oh well, come. Let's party!

Zoro: (getting irritated) THAT'S IT! I'M OUTTA HERE!( cuts table in half)

Luffy: (surprised) He cut our table! Come back!

Zoro: ( super mad) NO WAY!


	6. zoro enters the kingdom

Zoro in wonderland

**_The Card is not a specific person_**

**Nami: Queen of hearts**

**Sanji: King of hearts**

Zoro: that was crazy… (Sees an array of white flowers) What's this?

Card: Hey! You! Get over here, and help me!

Zoro: Why?

Card: it's for the Queen! We already planted white tulips, but we needed red ones! (Dismayed)

Zoro: (brings out the book he somehow kept and flips through the pages) Wait! In the book, it says 'roses'…

Narrator: this place is not exactly like the book…but fairly close…

Zoro: oh… I see... (To card) So, what will happen—?

_**Artist note: Zoro is painting with the card as well at this point.**_

Card: If the queen notices, she'll… (Action of squishing body)

Zoro: cool… (Inspired suddenly)

Card: (frantic) THAT'S NOT COOL!

Zoro: I wonder how many swords she has… I have three!

Card: SHH, here she comes!

Announcer: THE QUEEN OF HEARTS!

Nami: (stepping into view, sees Zoro and does a double-take)… Who are you?

Zoro: (surprised) Haven't I been asked this before?

Nami: (upset at the refusal) Not by me you haven't. Now answer the question!

Zoro: My name is Roronoa Zoro.

Nami: (calming down a bit') good… (Sniffs in the air and does a 'eww' face) I smell paint!

Sanji: (touches one of them) These flowers have been painted red!

Zoro: (looking hard at the king) Why does the king look so familiar?

Sanji: (mad) Who painted the roses red?

Card: (feverishly) I did.

Sanji: (loudly) Off with it's head!

Zoro: (taking some interest in the king's sense of energy) May I do the honors?

Sanji: (realizing that he might not have to do work, nonchalant) Sure, I don't want to do it anyway…

Zoro: (taking all three swords and holding them in his classic santoryu fashion) My pleasure. (Grinning)


	7. Croquet?

Zoro in wonderland

Nami: so, do you want to play golf?

Zoro: uh… no. I hate golf

Nami:you will do as I say!

Zoro: I don't know how!

Sanji: my honey will go first. Just so you know, you are highly favored in the court!

Zoro: (surprised) Oh really! Well, I guess I'll be playing golf now…(walks away)

Nami:( standing by a card with two objects) You will be playing with these…

(the objects are: and ostrich and a guinea pig)

Zoro: No way I'm playing with that!

Nami: (really upset) you will do as I say!

Zoro: your line is repetitive! Okay fine…( picks up ostrich and tries to swing it)

(zoro then sees that the bird's neck went crooked,and is slightly embaresed and mad. swings again. then sees that the guinea pig has moved. ostrich laughing,zoro gets real mad then)

Zoro:( yelling at the bird) ALRIGHT TURKEY! YOU BETTER COOPERATE OR ELSE I'LL CUT YOU STRAIGHT IN TWO!( ostrich sweats and zoro's smurks and snikers saying," that's right!")(an anouncer says the score and zoro smirks)

Sanji: now it's my turn! (his ostrich also has a curly eye)( swings, and crowd claps) Thank you, Thank you! (bows to crowd)

Someone random: Hey! Who stole the tarts?


	8. zoro' trial

Zoro in wonderland

(Dojinshi version)

Zoro: (looking around) Okay, so I don't know anything about court or jury. The book(flips book) says that 'she' called these idiots jurors… I don't think so… idiots suits them just fine! The king and queen STILL look so familiar… that's kind of creepy…

Sanji: bring in the Mad Hatter! (Ussop walks in) State your testimony!

Ussop: uh… (Shaking and sweating)

Zoro: Okay, this is boring… (to sanji) HEY YOUR KINGSHIP, WHEN IS IT MY TURN?

Sanji: (upset at the sudden interruption) Wait your turn! You might be next!

Zoro: (calms down) Good. 'Cause I'm feeling kind of awkward right now!( shaking and shivering a bit) (notices that he's having some issues, struggling) i can't fit into this seat anymore, i'll just move my leg up a bit.

Chopper: (upset) Hey you! stop moving around so much! you are pushing me into the side!

Zoro: (rudely) well sorry. I just so happen to b-!(growing a foot or so) *gulp* growing again!(to self) oh no… not NOW!

Chopper: Well, I'm getting out of here, while you keep on this nonsence! (leaves peeved)

Zoro: Great, And I thought the same thing a loooong time ago…

Brook: RORONOA ZORO! YOHOHO!

Zoro: (jumps up, answering to the call) HERE! (loses balance, and falls) whoa… yikes!(THUD) (Looks up after fall) whoa! I've growna lot since I fell… well…(patting legs, turns around hitting an inosent person with his sheath)(they say "ouch") Oh, sorry(sarcasticly)

Sanji: such a rude-

Zoro: (mad suddenly) Hey don't start! Why am I here?

Sanji:Did you steal any tarts?

Zoro: what are tarts?(cocks head)

Sanji:cookies…

Zoro: Nope, i didn't eat much at this place.(by the way, i'm kind of hungry)

Sanji: You didn'teat anything at all? That is surely a crime!

Luffy: Yeh! he didn't eat antything at our tea party!

Sanji:Not eating at a party is forbidden!(upset)

Zoro:(suprised) WHA?

Brook: (buts in) yeh. He also drank some of my sake! You giant!

(onlookers boo in protest)

Zoro: HEY! i got what you wanted,and i gave it to you... THE SAKE MADE ME GIANT!

(crowd, including royals gasp in horror)

Zoro: (continues) And tea party people- i, at the time was verrry cautious about my size ... whenever i eat or drink anything, that's what happens!

(crowd, including royals gasp in horror, again)

Zoro: (suddenly getting close to the place where sanji and nami are at) –AND **YOU!** KING OF HEARTS INDEED! Why, you're nothing but a BAD king!(shrinks) you're just a mean—(shrinks again) -demanding(shrinks some more) - BOSSY(a little more)

Narrator: um Zoro, you're…(sweat mark)

Zoro: (continuing without a care) Corrupt- your wife is three of the four…(shrinks).Anyway, you are an ID—(shrinking)—I(shrinks)-OT?(presently at normal size)

Narrator: shrinking…

Sanji: (laughing with glee) BWAHAHA! What do you have to say now bigshot?

Zoro: (suddenly realizing his apperant size) Oh-no! I'm small again… but how?

Sanji: Arrest him…

**Guess what? I'm going to stop there to keep suspense…BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!**


	9. Zoro's return

Zoro in wonderland

Zoro: WHA? I'm too young to die!—and I **don't** want to stay here forever!(Sees cards about to attack him) Well, this is sad…to watch!(Sticks hands in pockets and looks down in surprise when he notices something in his pockets) What is this in my pockets?... Hey, it's the pieces of mushroom I saved when I was smaller…Now, if I remember correctly… this side should be the side to get me bigger…(eats one side in hopes that he gets bigger)(to self)I can't believe I am doing this!

Sanji: Agh, he's starting to grow again! Make a barrier so he won't escape!

Zoro: (immediate action as cards covers him. He hits hard due to the speed of his change of size!) Ouch! That's sooner than I thought! (Outside the barrier, we see the cards throbbing because of Zoro's still changing size.) heh, so they are making a barrier so that I won't grow any more… well that won't last long.

Sanji: heheh

Zoro: (suddenly bursts out) why you little…(**really mad face)(**cards fly uncontrollably)

Sanji: ah! He broke through!

Zoro: (gets in sanji's face, like **really** close. And MAD.)**WELL DUH!** (to narrator) So, how do I get out of here?

Narrator: um… well once you're big enough, you can go through that door.

Zoro: (looks around) What door—(sees a huge door) oh THAT door!(feeling strange) I feel as if I'm over my limit in size!(stretching strangly)

Narrator: well maybe you are growing back to your original hight zoro!

Zoro: Wha? So I've been tiny all this time?

Narrator: seems that way…(cards pile up to zoro's size)

Zoro: It seems as if the cards are making another barrier. Now, where is that door?(sees it) AH! There it is, just the right size! OUTTA MY WAY!(stomps to door pushing cards easily out of the way) I'm so out of here! (takes swords out) ONI-…

**********MEANWHILE…

Sanji's washing dishes

Robin:Hm.. I wonder where bushido san is?

Sanji: oh he's most likely lifting weights somewhere…(to self) in wonderland!

Zoro: (crashing in) GIRI! (huffing and puffing)

Sanji: so how was it? I see you've survived!

Zoro:(Really MAD) I'm going to hurt you REAL bad, CURLYFACE!

Robin: What happened now?

Zoro: He sent me to a weird place!

Sanji: I wanted to see how he liked the ability to change sizes!

Zoro: I hated _**all**_ of it!

Sanji: At least you kept your personality, mostly…

Zoro: When was I not?

Sanji: **Painting with cards?**

Zoro: it was required…

Sanji: HAHAHAH!

Zoro: The book was my 'ticket' out! You did it on purpose!

Sanji: I had my fun…

Zoro: grrr…

**The end…**

Spoilers: next is Sanji in Wonderland… the idea of Zoro Travels might be available, review this and all others… this was my first one…


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